He who blames others
has a long way to go on his journey.
He who blames himself
is halfway there.
He who blames no one
At times I do feel halfway there, and I take responsibility for all that is happening in my life. And other times, I still have moments when I blame something or someone outside of myself. Which is ironic because I know everything is a reflection of me. I continue to learn from Taoism the simple yet profound statement of any resistance is my own. I wrote about resistance back in 2014, you can READ IT HERE.
Visualize a spiral for a moment …wouldn’t you agree that everything in life is a spiral? The simplicity of breath, day and night, the movement of blood within our bodies, and the beautiful seasons of nature.
When conditions repeat in our lives, whether it’s noticing a personal habit; how we react; broken healthy boundaries; the lesson continues to circle back until we have learned it. Although, it doesn’t come back the same way—visualize a spiral— it has risen. It comes back differently from another point in space, giving us another chance to choose a different strand of possibility with a different outcome.
A personal example is parenting. My daughter and I are similar in many ways. One example is how we enjoy quiet mornings on the weekend—giving each other space—to simply be ourselves, knowing we can connect with less effort afterwards.
On the other side, we also get upset with each other for something we in turn do/say to ourselves. We are both really self-critical, so it doesn’t help when the other person points out what we already know within. It’s like saying it’s raining outside when you are both standing in it. In other words, stating the obvious doesn’t help.
Each time we circle back and repeat a heated conversation, the lesson has risen, visualize the spiral. Even if it is a minute step, it’s a movement forward. Yes, we may be rehash some of the same circumstances, but with some rememberance of what we learned before. It continues to keep coming up, until we have both learned what we need to evolve.
Another way to move up the spiral with grace is having a birds-eye view. I literally at times after a discussion, heated or otherwise, imagine being above looking down on the two of us. As I look from above, it gives me many different perspectives to ponder. Which allows me to have compassion and empathy I couldn’t see before because of my limited view.
At this time in our world, may we all rise above to expand our view, and see the different aspects in all of us as we move forward on the sacred spiral of life.