Sitting at my computer this week, I wondered what brilliant subject, [now humor me, with that word—brilliant] I would write about. Of course, first I browsed Facebook, checked in on Twitter, and read some articles from a few favorite websites. I was hoping to receive some inspiration, but what it led me to instead was comparing myself with others. Have you ever done that? Beforehand, you’re feeling pretty good about yourself, some confidence, and then you begin to compare yourself not only with people you know, but total strangers. How crazy is that?
Well, I am here to tell you, it’s damn crazy… so why do we do it? Why do we think we should be somewhere else, then where we are? Sounds like a Zen koan, doesn’t it? Ponder that question for a moment, “Why do we think we should be somewhere else, then where we are?” I obviously don’t know all the answers, because I recently caught myself doing it.
Here’s what I’ve learned. It is hurtful to my Soul and my BE-ing, when I compare myself with others. [plus it pulls me from the present moment] And, the truth is—we really cannot compare. We are all unique individuals with different talents, beliefs, and thought filters. One cannot compare apples with oranges. One thing, I know for sure [yes, I picked that line up from Oprah] is that we are more the same than we are different. [same with apples and oranges = fruit]
We all desire to be seen, heard and accepted for being ourselves, the person we are today—in this moment—not tomorrow, next week or even next year. Which is why I love this quote by Confucius, “It does not matter how slowly you go, as long as you do not stop.”
I am continuously learning to be fluid in my life, going with the flow, allowing myself to move through feelings. Now, when I say move through feelings, I know for me, I must first BE with the feelings, “…the truthfulness of the moment.” [previous post, reveals more detail] I must BE and FEEL before I can MOVE. And if I do not allow those three things to happen, I get stuck in comparison-mode. Yes, that infinite downward spiral.
So, let’s make a promise to ourselves to keep moving slowly, loving where we are in this moment of life—give others the same respect—remain humble and grateful for it all. [And, so It Is…]
I’d love to hear some comments from you about your experiences in comparing, what you learned, and/or make promise to yourself to do less of it. [It’s really good to actually proclaim it out there, for everyone to see, I know it’s scary—but, you can do it!] Choosing to share what you learned from comparing, may also help someone else who reads this, which is a very powerful gift indeed.
Thanks for being here,